


Come back home

by Traumzauber



Category: The Maze Runner (Movies), The Maze Runner Series - All Media Types, The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: AU - normal human, Best Friends, Drug Addiction, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fist Fights, Helping Friends, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Newt/Thomas (if you squint), Reunion, Talk about feelings, understanding best friends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-17
Updated: 2020-10-17
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:02:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27062383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Traumzauber/pseuds/Traumzauber
Summary: It's been three years since Thomas lost his best friend to Newt's drug addiction. He knows he went about helping him in all the wrong ways; but back then, it seemed like the right thing.When a stranger appears at his front lawn, Thomas has a feeling that maybe, just maybe, his friend has found his way back home...
Relationships: Newt & Thomas (Maze Runner)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 12





	Come back home

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, thanks to the amazing [noxsoulmate](https://archiveofourown.org/users/noxsoulmate/pseuds/noxsoulmate) ❤️
> 
> You've helped me so much with this one and I'm so grateful. It would never turned out this good without you.

The cold October rain was pouring relentlessly from the dark and stormy sky as he stood in the front yard. He had the hood of his sweater over his head to give himself the illusion of being shielded from the downpour but it was to no avail. He was already drenched through to his skin and freezing. 

Three years had passed since he last stood here. It looked like not much had changed since then but at the same time, everything was different. He was different. He had done so much damage to himself that he was sure he would never be the same. Certainly not the same he was all those years ago. But he hoped with all his heart that - even damaged as he was - he would be welcomed back. Even after what he had done to Thomas.

***June 2017***

His room looked like it had exploded. He had spent the last half hour searching every corner of it frantically. All drawers were open and muddled up, their contents mostly scattered on the equally messy floor. Even his bed sheets and covers were thrown aside.

Completely absorbed in his desperate search, he didn't even notice that he wasn't alone anymore.

“Did you lose something?”

Newt whirled around when he heard Thomas's voice. He squinted his eyes as he realized that Thomas wasn't as unknowing as he tried to sound like. Thomas stood there, leaning relaxed against the door frame of Newt’s room; fixing him with a challenging gaze.

“What did you do?” Newt snapped at him. 

“What I had to.” Thomas's voice had an edge to it now. “Newt, you can't go on like this. You have to stop or it will kill you.”

“Don't be a bloody drama queen. I know what I'm doing,” Newt said sharply, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. 

Finally, Thomas dropped the act and detached himself from the door frame. He stood there with crossed arms and furrowed brows, his look dark. 

“No, you don't. Don't you see how addicted you already are? It's been only four months ago that you told me you will only try it this one time and now you barely make it through one day without it. Look at you. Look what you did to your room.” 

He unfolded his arms to gesture over the chaos that was once Newt’s usually spotless room. Newt followed automatically with his gaze even though he knew exactly how bad it looked. For a moment, just a second, he was ashamed. But Thomas was right, he had gone too far. So far that he couldn't see a way back; he didn't even want to. He got angry - at himself, but mostly at Thomas for what he knew he had done. His eyes narrowed.

“You took it.” 

It wasn't a question, no one knew Newt better than Thomas. He would never be able to hide anything from him. Of course, Thomas would find his hiding place - it wasn’t as if he didn’t have enough opportunity to search for it. For years, his best friend had been able to come and go as he pleased, wandering his house freely.

“Where is it?” Newt asked with squinted eyes, his voice tight.

Thomas leaned back against the doorframe, the unease and nervousness oozing out of him. So palpable, Newt had no problem picking up on it, even in his current state. Despite that, he answered as casually as if it didn't even matter. 

“Where it belongs. It's gone.”

~*~

It had been the wrong thing to say, Thomas knew right away. 

Just like that, Newt’s entire mood turned. His shoulders stiffened, his knuckles were nearly white from clenching his fists even more, and his gaze became hard and cold like stone.

Thomas was so taken aback by the sudden rage in his best friend's eyes that he couldn't even prepare himself against the first blow. 

Newt hit him square in the nose, causing Thomas’s eyes to water immediately. The force of the punch made him stumble backward which was the only reason why he escaped the second strike. Thomas raised his hands in defiance but Newt just kept coming at him. He got him once more and Thomas tasted blood in his mouth after his lip got pressed against his teeth with Newt's fist.

In the twelve years of their friendship, Thomas had never seen Newt like this. Newt had always been the calm one. He could be very sarcastic and had a dry sense of humor but most of the time he didn’t speak much if he didn’t have to. He was always kind to everyone. But that Newt seemed to be gone now. 

While Newt still tried to hit every inch of Thomas that he could reach and showered him with every insult that came to his mind, Thomas backed up towards the front door; his arms protectively around his head. He managed to reach behind him with one arm to open the door and stumbled out onto the lawn.

“Newt, please stop,” Thomas begged, as he tried to get some distance between himself and his completely frantic friend.

Not even once did Thomas try to fight back. The only thing he did was trying to hold off Newt’s hits against him. He knew that it wasn't really Newt. He was overpowered by his addiction and couldn't control himself anymore. And Thomas couldn't hurt his best friend - especially not while he was out of his mind. 

Under normal circumstances, they were equally strong but Newt’s outrage seemed to give him an extra boost of strength. So much so that he managed to shove Thomas to the ground. In an automatic attempt to catch his fall, Thomas grabbed the first thing within his reach - Newt's shirt - and dragged his friend with him to the ground, where Newt landed on Thomas. Pinning him to the ground, Newt kept trying to hit Thomas, but he was now able to catch Newt's arms and held them as far away from himself as he could.

Newt struggled to get his arms free from Thomas's grip. 

“Please Newt, stop. You're hurting me,” Thomas begged again - hoping to get through the daze in Newt's mind.

Suddenly, something in Newt’s eyes shifted, his gaze seemed to clear. He looked down at Thomas and he could see the exact moment when Newt realized what he was doing. His eyes widened in shock and his mouth fell open as he struggled to get off of Thomas and stumbled to his feet, hastily making sure to put some distance between them.

Newt carded his hands through his dirty-blond hair, fixing Thomas with an equally nervous and desperate stare. “I’m sorry, Tommy. I’m so sorry,” he stammered as he began his restless pacing.

“It’s okay, Newt. It’s okay. We will figure this out,” Thomas said reassuringly while he slowly got up himself. He could feel his bleeding lip throb but he ignored it for the moment; fully concentrated on his friend. He made a few cautious steps toward Newt, his hands slightly raised to show that he didn’t want to fight again but also to be prepared if Newt’s mood changed once more. “We will get you some help. I will help you.”

“No, you don’t,” Newt shouted, angry again. 

Thomas immediately stopped where he was, ready to protect himself again. 

But Newt didn’t attack him this time. He only screamed at him, “How could you do this to me, Tommy? I thought you were my friend.”

Taken aback from this course of the conversation, Thomas lowered his hands and stammered out, “I am, you know that. That's why I'm doing this.”

“No, if you’re really my friend, you’d never done this to me.”

“But… I did it to help you. Newt, this stuff is going to kill you and you know it. I can’t stand by and watch while you ruin your life.”

“This isn’t your decision to make. This is my life and I decide what I do and what I don’t do with it. And if I want to drown out the shit show that is my life, then it is none of your business.” Newt almost spat the words at Thomas.

“But, Newt…” Thomas was so shocked that he couldn’t find words. 

He knew Newt’s life hadn’t been easy recently. Of course, he knew. And he wasn’t blind to the fact that they spend almost all of their free time at Thomas’s house now. Newt never had a close relationship with his step-father and it had only gotten worse since he lost his job almost a year ago. He and Newt were constantly fighting. Nothing that Newt did was good enough, everything that went wrong was his fault. His mother tried to intervene but she was too scared of losing her husband and sure that everything was going to be okay when he found a new job.

Thomas knew all of this but he didn’t know that Newt’s pain was so deep that he rather tried to shut it all out than talk to his best friend about it.

“Just go,” Newt said, his voice tired. “I don't wanna see you anymore.” His shoulders slumped and his hands still combed through his hair now and then. He seemed to have no fight left in him when he turned and began to walk toward his front door.

Thomas could see that Newt needed some time to come down and get some rest. He dragged his hand over his face, wincing when he accidentally rubbed across his injured lip. He needed some time, too. “Okay… I will come back-” 

Before he could finish his sentence, Newt spun around; renewed anger all over his face. “No! Don't you get it? I don't want your help, Thomas! I don't _need_ your help. Just leave me alone!” He shouted, then turned around again. The bang of the door an echoing sound in Thomas's ears.

Thomas left but regardless of what Newt said, he would be back. Because that's what friends do.

But first, he had to change his clothes and clean himself up or his mother would be worried and ask questions when she came home and found him like that. In addition to his bloody lip, he had quite a few scratches and bruises on his arms. 

He didn't stay away long from Newt’s house though - just a few hours - but when he came back, Newt was gone; and so was part of his stuff and the money from the jar in the kitchen; leaving Thomas with nothing but bad feelings, a guilty conscience, and Newt’s very concerned mother to deal with…

***October 2020***

Thomas stood at the stove to make some dinner for his sister and himself like he always did when his mother had the late shift. He always put some of it for her aside to eat when she came home. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see a movement out in their front yard. He frowned. It was too early for his mom to be home and he didn’t even hear her car. 

When he turned to the window he could see a figure standing in the pouring rain. A slender man in dark clothes, his face hidden in the shadows of his hood. The man just stood there and Thomas felt as if he looked right into his eyes. Even at that distance and in the dark he could feel the gaze of the stranger. As scary as this should be, Thomas couldn't help the hope that was creeping up inside of him.

He blindly reached for the switch to turn off the stove. His eyes never left the man outside the window; too afraid that he might vanish if he didn’t fix him with a gaze.

“Brenda, I will be right back,” Thomas said almost absentmindedly to his little sister, who was sitting on the couch and watched an episode of her favorite sitcom. 

She didn’t even look at him when she answered, “Okay. Where are you going?”

Startled, Thomas stuttered, “I-I just forgot something… in the garage. Be right back.” He hurried to the front door, anxious to see if maybe his hope wasn’t in vain. He didn’t even care that his hastily grabbed jacket was without a hood. At least it would warm him a bit. He didn’t have the patience to search for another one.

He always wished that Newt would come back one day. Always feared the day when he might find out that he never will. Now he finally had a chance to find out which one it would be.

As he closed the door behind himself, he hesitated. What if it was Newt? Would it be _his_ Newt; the Newt who he had known almost his entire life? Or would it be the Newt that left without a word? Who left his mother and his best friend behind; worried and scared and - in the very end - grieving, not knowing what had happened to him.

Thomas was the one who had to explain to Newt’s desperate mother what her son had done to himself in the months before he vanished; after beating Thomas bloody and stealing most of the savings from his mother. Together with Thomas’s mother and sister they had searched everywhere. For weeks. The police couldn’t help them because Newt was already eighteen.

But all this wouldn’t matter as long as Newt was finally back home. The longer he looked at him, the more Thomas recognized similarities. He couldn’t tell for sure, but he was sure the man on his lawn was taller than he remembered Newt being. Not by much, but a bit. Though that hardly said anything, after all it was possible that Newt had grown a bit more. Thomas had too. He certainly had the same slim shape. He also leaned a little to one side - just like Newt had always done, ever since an injury in his leg had never healed completely.

Thomas finally took a deep breath, straightened his back, and took a step towards the stranger. His eyes had never left Thomas; he could feel it.

When Thomas began to cross the lawn toward him, he made a move as if he was about to run. Thomas noticed the movement and slowed down, unsure if he should move further.

There were only a few yards left between them and Thomas was already drenched, just like his opponent.

“Newt, is this really you?” he asked hesitantly. He wanted to take the last steps towards him but at the same time, he was anxious he might scare him away if he went too fast. 

“Yeah, it's me.” 

Newt’s voice was quiet and insecure as if he was afraid of what reaction his answer might cause. His hands were moving in the big front pocket of his sweater like he was wringing them.

At this confirmation, a storm of emotions raged through Thomas. Relief, joy, fear, and anger were fighting in his head. Finally, the relief and joy that Newt was still alive and home, at last, won and Thomas surged the last few steps forward to pull an obviously startled Newt into a bone-crushing hug.

After a few seconds of hesitation, Newt raised his arms and hugged Thomas back. The rain was still pouring down on them while they clang onto each other until Thomas noticed that Newt was shivering. 

He reluctantly untangled himself from Newt and threw an arm around his shoulders; not ready to lose the physical contact again just now. “Come on in before we both get sick,” he said as he already stirred Newt towards the front door. His friend followed timidly but with no resistance.

Thomas had to let go of Newt to get through the door. When the warmth inside engulfed them, Thomas trembled as well. If he was already cold, he could only imagine how much Newt must be freezing. “Come up, you can take a shower and I will give you some dry clothes.”

“You don’t have to do that,” Newt tried to decline hastily. 

But Thomas was having none of it. “Don’t be stupid. You will catch a cold if you don’t get out of this wet stuff. And besides, my mom won’t be amused if you continue to drip on her floor,” he insisted. 

Newt nodded and followed Thomas up the stairs, oblivious to the curious stare from Brenda that followed them.

A few minutes later, Thomas came back down the stairs; alone and with fresh clothes on. The sound of the shower was audible from the second floor.

“Thomas, who is that?” 

Thomas met the curious eyes of his sister and was suddenly very nervous about how she might react to Newt’s surprising return. Delaying the moment he had to answer, he walked past her where she was still sitting on the couch, and went back into the kitchen to finish cooking. Her gaze caused a prickling sensation on his neck.

“Thomas?” Brenda’s voice sounded timid now. She seemed to catch on to the tense atmosphere. 

After a deep breath, Thomas sighed and finally answered. “It’s Newt.”

“What?” she exclaimed. 

Even though he anticipated an outburst like that, he still flinched. 

“How? Did you know he was coming? Why didn’t you say something? When did he come back? Where was he all the time?” 

Not stopping to breathe between any of her questions, she didn’t give Thomas any time to answer even one of them. Before he could, they heard the shower being turned off and looked up.

“Okay Brenda, listen. I don’t know what’s happening. I didn’t know he was coming back but I’m glad he did. Please, can you just give me some time alone with him so I can figure out what’s going on? I don’t want to scare him away again if we interrogate him. Can you do that?” he asked hurriedly because Newt could be back down with them at any moment.

Thomas could see that she wasn’t okay with this, at all, but after a few seconds, her face softened and she nodded. “I guess I’ll eat in my room tonight,” she replied with a sigh and got up to grab a plate, fill it and walk past him again. “See you later. Good luck,” she said while she walked up the stairs and closed the door to her room right before Thomas could hear the bathroom door open.

Newt hesitantly made his way down the stairs and for the first time in over three years, Thomas saw his best friend up close. 

He had always looked so much younger than he really was. Nothing had changed about that. Actually, he looked healthier than Thomas would have expected, aside from the dark circles under his eyes - clearly caused by sleep deprivation. His hair was longer than Thomas had ever seen it but it suited him; it was still a little damp from the shower. 

Thomas’s clothes were a little bit loose on Newt because he was even thinner than he had appeared in his baggy clothes. Though since Thomas was on the lean side too, they would do until Newt could put back on his own clothes, which were currently in the dryer.

“I was about to eat dinner. Do you want something? I made soup.” 

The tension was almost palpable. Neither of them knew how to handle this situation properly.

“No, it’s okay,” Newt answered, his voice barely audible. He wasn’t looking at Thomas but the floor in front of him instead.

“Newt,” Thomas said with a sigh and waited for Newt to look up to him and into his eyes before he went on, “Are you hungry?”

“Yes,” Newt choked out after a moment. 

“Then sit and eat something with me,” Thomas demanded. 

Newt finally left his spot in the middle of the room and went to sit on the place where he had always sat for as long as Thomas could remember.

Thomas filled up two plates and brought them over to the table before he got some cutlery out of the drawer and a few slices of bread from the basket. Newt thanked him and then they sat in silence while they ate.

Deep in thought, Thomas tried to process the situation and to put his still whirling emotions in order.

Once they had both emptied their plates, Thomas put the dirty dishes in the dish-washer whereas Newt was staring into his glass of water; clinging to it like it was the only thing that held him in place.

Thomas watched him for a moment before he suggested, “Let’s get comfortable,” and walked over to the couch. Newt followed suit, putting his glass down on the table in front of it.

He sat stiffly, staring down at his intertwined hands in his lap while Thomas was sitting on the opposite end with his back against the armrest so he could watch Newt.

“So, how are you?” Thomas had already realized that he had to start this conversation because Newt couldn’t seem to find the words or the courage to speak.

“I’m better. It will take a lot of time until I’m okay again, but I will hopefully get there,” Newt answered, still cautious and still not looking up. But Thomas could see that Newt's eyes darted toward him.

“So you don’t…” he started but couldn’t get the words out.

“No,” Newt replied, finally looking up and into Thomas’s eyes. “I don’t take anything anymore. Not even medicine against headaches.”

“Good, that’s good. How long?”

“How long since I stopped using?” Thomas nodded. “Seven months next week,” Newt replied, his voice cautious again. Thomas knew Newt still well enough to notice that he was holding something back - probably something that he knew Thomas wouldn’t respond well to.

Thomas frowned. “Seven months? When did you come back into town?”

“Today…” His answer sounded more like a question and Thomas could feel the anger rising inside him. 

“Today? You’ve been clean over half a year and you came back only just now? Did your mom know? What did she say? How is she?” Now it was Thomas’s turn to ask questions too fast to have them answered. When he realized it, he stopped and looked expectantly at Newt.

Newt’s demeanor got cautious. “I don’t know. I haven’t talked to her yet.” 

That was too much. All this time they were worried about him and feared that he might be dead and Newt could have ended it all months ago. Even if he wasn’t ready to come back home just then, he could have at least given them a little peace of mind. But he didn’t. 

The anger that was drowned out earlier came back tenfold. It took over and Thomas nearly exploded with it. He surged up from his side of the couch, too angry to sit. 

“What do you mean you haven’t talked to her yet? What did you do all these months? Where have you been? She was freaking out when you were gone. We were worried sick, did you know that? Did you even care?”

Newt cringed as Thomas was practically screaming all his penned up anger at him. He wasn’t able to sit anymore either. He started pacing and carded his hand through his hair - a nervous gesture that he never lost.

He stopped his pacing and looked Thomas right in the eyes, his own glistening with tears. With his voice shaking he confessed, “No, I didn’t. I never thought once about what my mother would go through or what you would go through when I left. The only thing I thought about for a long time was where I could get my next hit.” The tears were now streaming down his face. Thomas just looked shocked about that sudden honest outburst.

“I didn’t care about the grief that I would cause my mother if I die. I was a horrible son to her and I was a terrible friend to you. I know, I know. I’m-I’m here…”, he gulped and took a deep breath, his voice barely audible through his tears, “I’m here to say I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Tommy.” 

At this, Thomas finally remembered how to move. He rushed forward and pulled Newt into a crushing hug for the second time this day. He held him tight while Newt sobbed into his shoulder. 

In between the sobs, Thomas could hear him mumble, “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.”

He loosened his grip on Newt to look him in the eyes. “Of course I forgive you. You weren’t the only one who made mistakes. What I did was wrong. I wanted to help you but instead, I made it worse. I’m sorry and I swear I won’t do it again. We will do it at your own pace, okay? I promise.”

Newt nodded and wiped his tears away. They sat down again, this time side by side. Newt sat with his elbows perched on his knees, his head propped between his hands. 

“I haven’t talked to my mother yet because I don’t know how to. What could I possibly say to her to make this right? All that I’ve done to her.”

“All that she wants is you back home,” Thomas reassured him.

“That’s even worse,” Newt exclaimed. “I don’t deserve her forgiveness. I don’t deserve her love. I deserve your anger and I sure as hell deserve hers.” His voice was shaking again and his hands trembled. “Please Tommy, please. I can’t do this without you.”

Thomas slung an arm around Newt’s shoulders, pulling his friend closer. He knew this was far from being over, there was so much work ahead of them, more pain, maybe more heartbreak, definitely more suffering. But he would be damned if he would let Newt go through it alone for another minute.

“You don’t have to,” he reassured him. “I promise, you don’t have to.” 


End file.
